Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Iiittttt’ss been one week...

A week ago today was when I arrived home to find the door bashed in and our apartment emptied of most of our electronic devices, some earrings and a couple of gym bags. I’ve learned a lot in the past week. Here are some of them.

The initial reaction:
My temper isn't as controlled as I thought it was
The control over my language is greater than I thought it was
My lust for revenge outweighs reason

The trespassers:
Are idiots and a myriad of other names (see comments in Violated)
Don’t know good comedy (they left Seinfeld)
Shouldn’t underestimate my ability to hold a grudge

The gun:
You have to drive to Cumming, Georgia to find a place that’ll sell you one
Without a criminal record, buying a gun’s easy
Anonymous wants me to ‘PLEASE BE CAREFUL!”
My sister wants me to “hit ‘em with your best shot”
My brother’s girlfriend wants me to “fire away”

The mental aftermath:
It’s hard not to stereotype
It’s hard not to stereotype
It’s hard not to stereotype

Couple of lessons learned:
Get to know your neighbors
Replace the 2” screws in your door with 4” screws
You can’t have too many locks
You can only have so many locks

The moral lesson:
Things are just things; they can be replaced
Joy comes from people, not material goods
I need to be more like the friends I have
Don't let the actions of others determine your happiness

Paula and I are safe. We appreciate the outpouring of concern, support and help we’ve received.
Amy, Melissa, Todd, Mark, Noelle and Holly: a special, heartfelt shout for your incredible generosity and undeviating friendship. Thank you all so much. We are blessed to have you as our friends.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

An ounce of prevention...and a slug

"I know what you're thinking. 'Did he fire six shots or only five?' Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?"

Any punk who tries to violate my home and disturb my peace of mind is going to find themselves in a similar situation as did the criminal in the movie Dirty Harry. They won't have the luxury of staring down the barrel of a little .44 Magnum; they'll get to face the consequences of a 12-gauge pump action Winchester shotgun with 3" slugs. Like to invade people's homes and steal things? Try it with a whole in your gut. How you like them apples?

This is one of the measures I've taken to help secure our home after the experience we had on Wednesday. (If you don't know what I'm referring to, just read the previous post.) It is a Winchester 12 gauge shotgun. Holds four shells plus one in the chamber. I've loaded a warning shot with pellets, followed by some 3" slug cartridges. Having experienced what we did and having experienced first-hand the depravity and pathetic behavior some of the baser human beings with whom we coexist, I've decided there are to be no chances taken as pertaining to the safety of Paula and myself.
So, Mr. Low-life Punk who has chosen a life of criminality and deviance, next time you want to trespass and take something that doesn’t belong to you, don't bring a knife to this gunfight. Papa bear has a little present waiting for you.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006


At 4:27pm on June 21, 2006, I received a call from Paula as I drove into our apartment complex – Eagles Pointe. Her voice was shaking.
“Logan, I think someone tried to break into our apartment.”In a moment I had parked the car and was at the door. There was significant damage to the door and frame; I was enraged.

The Door

More door

You can see how they use a crowbar and hammer to bus into the apartment

Without taking into account the appropriate safety precautions, I pushed open the warped door and surveyed the scene. Someone had not only tried, but had succeeded in breaking into our apartment. At once I noticed things missing. The rack which held all our DVD’s (20+), my X-Box games (10) was practically empty; our DVD player was missing; my X-Box and the three controllers I had were also gone.

The rack that used to be full of DVD's; the idiots didn't take Season 3 of Seinfeld. The most expensive set besides Band of Brothers.

Walking down the hall, I came to the first bedroom. All the drawers were pulled out and on the ground; the mattress and several blankets were strewn about the room. Several of Paula’s bags were missing, as was the Canon Rebel 35mm camera she loved.

Note all the books are still there.

Onto the master bedroom, I found several drawers open, the contents strewn about. Paula’s jewelry box was open and several items were missing, including her favorite watch, a Christmas gift from her mother. The most expensive item stolen was her school-issued laptop computer, and IBM Thinkpad. Totaled up, these thieves and low-life’s made out with at least $3000 worth of merchandise from our apartment; they transported the stolen goods in her gym bag was also stolen, in which was her MP3 player and headphones.

The most frustrating thing is not that these worthless individuals made off with some of our material possessions; it isn’t that we had no renters insurance; the thing that makes me angrier than I have ever been in my entire life is my home was violated. Strangers, individuals without morals, the thugs who are worthless except to God (and only through a love I cannot comprehend) rummaged through our possessions and violated the place we are supposed to be safe.
These imbeciles who trespassed into our home were not intelligent individuals; no books were taken. These asinine juveniles who stole from us were not doing it because they were hungry; no food was taken. These no good, dimwitted jackasses who have robbed my wife and I of our peace of mind were not in need of shelter or warmth; no clothes or blankets were taken. These pathetic wastes-of-flesh were punks who stole those things they can sell and get money for.
These subhuman encroachers, these parasites, are individuals who will never hold a job; they are putrid scum who will lie, cheat and steal their way through this mortal existence, robbing individuals of material possessions, peace of mind and eventual they will take someone’s life. These despicable vermin will not take advantage of a free education; they will not take advantage of government grants and subsidies. They will not use the gifts of living in the most generous country in the world because they are lazy, pathetic, loathsome creatures.
These miserable excuses for human beings will slough their way through life, leaching of your tax dollars and mine as we pay for their meals, housing and vehicles because they don’t work; our tax doalrs will pay their legal fees every time they are arrested; our tax dollars will pay their burial fees when they are shot by police, meet their end at the hand of one of their peers in prison or with a needle full of poison.
And when that finally happens, good riddance to bad rubbish.
I won’t cry.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006


People driving slow in the fast lane bothers me. A lot. It definetly makes my top five of things other people do that annoy me. (My TFTOPDAM.) Up for discussion today is another item in the TFTOPDAM. This gripes me more, actually. This item is the lack of respect and patriotism for this country. The basic freedoms and rights afforded the citizens – and non-citizens for that matter – are second to none; as such, these rights and freedoms are often abused by those individuals whose selfish endeavors belittle the noble and undermine the brave. It is the slimy byproduct of these inherent freedoms.
Patriotism – loving one’s country and supporting its authority and interests – is an essential attribute for maintaining freedom. Any organization that is successful over the long term understands the necessity for internal solidarity and unity in a common cause; without this, an organization may be successful, but only until a stronger and more unified organization decides to assert itself. Then it will fall to pieces.
Likewise with our country: unless the people have an overarching sense of loyalty and support to the nation in which they dwell, their country begins a swift and dangerous spiral towards ambivalence; from ambivalence to discontent, from discontent to disarray, from disarray to ambiguity. It is then the collective is weakest, having destroyed itself from the inside; and with no interior support its strength is an apparition.
Many of the malcontents who feel the need for this outdated passion (patriotism) come from a little town called Hollywood. It is interesting that many of these people are some of the least educated as to history and social science; many are the overindulged who have never been told ‘no’ and get what they want when they want it because of their status or money. One trio of gripers is the Dixie Chicks. In a recent interview with the London Telegraph, lead singer Natalie Maines made her view of patriotism very clear:

"The entire country may disagree with me, but I don't understand the necessity
for patriotism. Why do you have to be a patriot? About what? This land is our
land? Why? You can like where you live and like your life, but as for loving the
whole country... I don't see why people care about patriotism."
Ah, the wisdom of the overindulged; why care about anything but yourself? Pick your social woe, become a vigilante for its cause and who cares about anything – or anyone – else. I think we should all adopt this type of mentality.
Let’s call in Mainestality.
Definition: It’s about me.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Alphabet Soup

As the title of this post indicates, just some random shizzle. First item of business...

Someone – or something – left a comment on the last post. It’s really weird and posted below as it came:

Fister says.More car shoppers are Southwest Airlines flight skidded off a file charges until next week. features, and Acanthostega, the clear path to American citizenship for
This was from Manuel Spindleberger. It was posted at 4:44 pm yesterday. Hmmm. Interesting, isn’t it? Manuel must be a Hispanic-Germanic American. And who is Fister? If it's a he, then he'd be Mr. Fister. This whole thing is a little disturbing.
Next topic….

Went to Doc Chey’s last night with the ol’ crew. It was good. Had these funky salted beans...they were really good. After eating oodles of noodles, we went to Piedmont Park for the movie thing DaveFM does on Thursday nights. I don’t remember the name and don’t feel like finding it. There were thousands and thousands of people there. We didn’t see any of the feature – Ferris Beuller’s Day Off – because it was so packed. There are a lot of weirdoes and crazies that come out at night at Piedmont Park. But crazy people have to come out in public. Otherwise they’d just be people with big holes in their noses and ears with body art, sitting in their apartment watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.

I’ve updated the content at For those who have been there, you know what I’m talking about. Those who haven’t, don’t worry about it. Anyway, there are 5-10 more chapters available for your enjoyment – or ridicule, whatever’s taking you there – so enjoy.

Today one of our supervisors brought in Chik-Fil-A for everyone. I mean a TON of it. I’d guess 20-30 Chikin’ biscuits, 20-30 boxes of tots, 20-30 boxes of Chikin breakfast burritous, 20-30 sausage biscuits and a big platter of some kind of cinnamon roll thing. I’m not exaggerating these numbers. It was like manna…but better...and not from heaven...and easily identifiable...and provided by Amy...I guess the only correlation I can draw is we were thankful for it. (I’m hoping that isn’t blasphemous, saying Chik-Fil-A breakfast foods are better than manna.)

Does it make me less of a man that I like the song For You I Will by Teddy Geiger? That's a rhetorical question, so no smart comments. You hear me Manuel? Sie hören mich, Manuel? ¿Usted me oye, Manuel?
Some other random songs I enjoy: Sister by The Nixons, Closer to Free by The Bodeans, Steal My Sunshine by LEN, Banditos and Interstate and Go Down by The Refreshments, and Zip-Lock by Lit.
Finally (and most disturbing)…

Why am I getting the shaft? In six short years I’ve built a dynasty out of the tiny Richmond Spiders, boosted attendance from a measely 8,000 to a maxed out 25,000, overcame NCAA probation (resulting in a limited number scholarships to recruit with), playing in a weak conference (the MAC), have won three National Championships, am currently undefeated and with one regular season game left am not slated to play in the championship game. It’s a travesty, a sham and a mockery…it’s a traveshamockery! Another example of the problems with the BCS system…
Isn't that incredible all that is 100% true...and can be found in a video game? I love techonology! Ich liebe Technologie! ¡Adoro la tecnología!

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Teach the Children

So I have a new church calling. I’ve been called as the second councilor in the Young Men’s presidency; that doubles as the Deacon’s Quorum advisor. Trying to teach a bunch of 12 to 14-year-old’s gospel oriented material and helping to inspire in them testimonies of the divinity of Jesus Christ and how to use the Spirit to guide them is an interesting challenge. Kids will be kids and boys will be boys. It’s a trip.
Basically, there are four types of kids: The one who’s oblivious to all things gospel related; the one who knows everything and answer ever question; the annoying one who thinks he’s funny; the one who gets stuck on some tangent because his parents forgot the Ritalin. A couple weeks ago we had a lesson about fasting. The typical spectrum of answers to my questions sort of go like this:

What’s the difference between starving and fasting?

“What is fasting?”
“Fasting is going without food or drink for 24 hours; it is for a purpose and should be combined with prayer and scripture study. Starving's just not eating. Sometimes I…”
“It means you can run fast.”
“I’m hungry. I like licorice.”

Okay…great. Why do we fast?
“Does it mean you run fast?”
“To learn to put the physical desires of our bodies secondary to things of a spiritual nature. We are asked to fast once a month – the first Sunday – and pay fast offerings. Our fast offerings should be generous and aren’t the same as tithing. Tithing is actually a…”
“Seriously, I’m really fast.”
“I like red licorice.”

Right…good. What are some of the blessings that come from fasting?
“You mean like a medal for winning a race?”
“There can be an increase in testimony; people can be healed. Sometimes there is rain after a drought. In our family history, there was this time my great-great-great-grandpa was a boy and there was a drought….”
“You’re blessed I don’t race you.”
“I don’t like black licorice.”
Um huh...Did you know who fasted 40 days?

“That’s impossible. A person would die!”
“Jesus. He was in the wilderness and was tempted by Satan in three ways: turning the rock into bread, being given wealth and popularity, and also to have angels catch him. But these are also all figurative temptations… ”
“I bet I’m faster than you are. You’re old”
"Are Twizzler’s and Red Vines both licorices?”

OK! I think that's the bell. Time to go.

Friday, June 09, 2006

Justify this

Tragically, a nine year-old boy paid the price for a lax immigration policy earlier this week in Sandy Springs, Georgia, on Monday night. Santos Cabrera, a 21-year-old illegal immigrant from Honduras, leapt from a car after Jordin said that the cars tire looked like it was going to fall off. He proceeded to yell at the little boy before using an ax to kill the child.
Cabrera was later shot to death by police after he attempted broke an officers arm by throwing a tire and then coming after the fallen officer with a metal pipe. The real kicker is late last month Cabrera was arrested after he was caught with a stolen vehicle. He was released after a brief stay in prison. Why wasn’t an illegal immigrant removed from the country after he had broken the law? This is because there is no law as of yet that requires an individual to provide proof of legal status in the United States; hence, this criminal was able to stay, steal another vehicle which transported him to this apartment complex, where he planted an axe in the head of an innocent 9-year-old boy.
Pundits who espouse the ideology of illegal aliens (oops, allow me to be PC: undocumented immigrants) as individuals who are upstanding people who just want a better life are making an overarching assumption that is erroneous from its genesis: upstanding individuals don’t participate in illegal activities. This holds true to the illegal immigrants and to those who knowingly employee them; but the line is continually blurred, with those who seek to enforce the laws of the land as racist or elitist who hold the little man down. But this isn’t about race; it isn’t about classes/subclasses. It’s about letting people into this country who are honest and forthright; there is no honesty or forthrightness about being illegal. And that is dangerous
Just ask Jordin.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Brotherly love

Brotherly love

This video was introduced to me by Natalie and Will last night. I think it is hilarious; my body hurt after watching it, I was laughing so hard. Enjoy

Tuesday, June 06, 2006


I was recently forwarded an email concerning the war in Iraq, putting the effort in perspective in regards to the other struggles in which the United States has been engaged. That is a post for another day when I have more time to contemplate what I read. Anyway, I enjoyed what I read and wanted to post it (which I will), but before that happened I thought it wise to verify the authenticity of it. Eventually I was able to verify the dialogue as accurate, though the purported timing of the event was off by 30 years. I found this to be interesting.
In my reply to the forwarder (my dad) and another forwardee (my dad's twin brother), I relayed what I'd found and then commented on the essence of the article. I included a quote I love, but couldn't remember the source. So I Googled it:

‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing’

Well, it was attributed to Edmund Burke, the 18th century British statesman. I went to a website,, and was stunned to find there is no actual proof Burke said that. At all. Isn't that incredible? There are over 1000 variations of this quote (a 1001 if you count mine), all attributed to Burke. But there is no source to which a person can look as the authentic statement.
Regardless, it's a great moral statement. If - and when - evil (and yes, there is good and evil) triumphs, it is because good, moral individuals chose to do nothing to prevent its proliferation. Rather, they have done as Alexander Pope said:
'Vice is a monster of so frightful mien, As to be hated needs but to be seen;
Yet seen to oft, familiar with her face, We first endure, then pity, then

They endured, pitied and then embraced the vice until has become a part of their lives. Are these 'good' individuals, therefore, any more good? (It's rhetorical.)
Well, basically I was amazed at all the stuff floating around out there that probably isn't true, but that we've been led to believe because of the simpleness of throwing around stories across the world. Crazy. If you've received an email or seen pics on the 'Net that are way out there, check out these two sites; they are pretty good about discerning the legitimacy of these types of things: They are and
Oh, and that Pope quote: Alexander Pope, Essay on Man (ep. II, l. 217).