Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Pork everywhere!

Fat
I had a revelation while attempting to play basketball over Thanksgiving – I am fat. And out of shape. And fat.

This wasn’t so much a revelation as a culmination: the inverse ratio of diminishing jaw-line to increasing waistline was a fair indicator; it seemed my gut was expanding faster than the federal government. But it wasn’t until trying to run up and down a court that the painful and embarrassing reality filled every fiber of my being…particularly my atrophied lungs.

Fortunately this basketball game was in Wyoming, so my buddy Nick was there and he is in excellent shape thanks to a little something called P90X. This is one of those workout programs you see advertised late at night, sandwiched between infomercials promising riches by selling your old nail clippings and how to get more hair – and women – by strapping a cat to your head; I was skeptical.

But Nick’s diamond-stamped triceps and his ability to run up and down the court like a gazelle across the Serengeti was proof enough for me that this was something that I needed to do. Along comes Christmas and with it P90X – 12 DVD’s that would act as the harbinger of death for my gelatinous body.

Well, I’m on week three (technically Week 4, but Week 1 was such a mess that I decided to scrap it) of the program and this is what I’ve discovered so far: first, P90X is code for ‘welcome to hell’; second, I was much farther down the road to blobness than I anticipated; third, P90X is awesome.

Anyway, there’s my endorsement for the program. Definitely something that will work you over, but something that is enjoyable and that produces results. I’m not going to hit the beach anytime soon, but my reps have increased each week and there is even a certain level of enjoyment as my body is abused by Tony Horton.

Fatter

Everyone give a hand to the federal government for strapping us and our children with nearly $2 trillion (2,000,000,000,000). Really excited about this, the total bill between TARP and the “stimulus” is going to end up being nearly $10 trillion (9,700,000,000,000). No big deal – just going to cost my daughter and her family nearly 80% of their gross income to make up the difference. Thank goodness for Big Brother taking care of us all.

I wonder if there’s any administration in history that has done so much to hurt our nation so quickly after coming into office. I haven’t the time or the energy to talk about it all, so I’m going to provide some links and you all can check it out.

Links that should make you think:

Universal healthcare is on its way

Play now, pay later

Breaking down the cost

Stimulus 101

Tax cuts don't work? Please...

8 Comments:

Ryanne said...

I am glad to hear you are doing P90X. It it some tough stuff. In fact it is way to extreme for me... I had to stop because it wasn't very good for my health. That Tony is an interesting guy. I am also glad to see that you have updated. Ben and I have been pretty disappointed with the stimulus package as well.

I hope you are all doing well. We miss you guys.

Anonymous said...

I think a better discussion about stimulussin is more than dollars, it's about since when did every politician become a Maynardo'? The Nard' dog was on to somthing don't get me wrong, but I'm all about let it go to hell, and the market will fix itself.

Cacker said...

I'm not anonymous, I'm cackeriffic, the president of the Cybercamorons! Really logan, how long did you look on the internet for a picture of a fat guy! thats nice. Live for today, let yor children worry about our debt, China will never cash in our treasury IOU's anyways so who cares. SPEND SPEND SPEND! DEBT DEBT DEBT! Love it. P.S. I never thought you are fat, fyi!
Cacker out.

rachell enger said...

Logan. Sorry I didn't post a comment for a while, but I just recovered from the shock of seeing a new post. You, me, Forrest, we can all be worked over together with our workout instructors. You're not alone in the fat world, brother (and I do not speak for Forrest in this statement).

PS I also read all of the links you gave. Even though I didn't understand all of them, exactly, I still am disappointed and worried about the stimulus bill too.

Looseweight said...

being fat is not abig deal , one can easily loose it with little work

Mandinko said...

Logan,

As you may know I am in support of my man Barack Obama. First off. Let's see.

1) Barack inherited a 1.3 trillion deficit from Bush and his so called war on terror. Usually there is some kinda of bonafide proof of something. I guess Haliburton, General Dynamics, and Lockheed shareholders are happy.

2) Banks tried to get rich off of subprime loans and ALT-A loans (hint hint - poor people and folks with bad credit and higher interest rates like 10-15%. The conservative argument is they were forced to do so by the Clinton argument. The banks knew what they were doing and to tell you the truth they knew those folks would be in trouble in 3-5 years. Another thing is everybody wants to blame the mortgage market. Last time I checked the subprime and Alt-A market only accounts for less than 10% of the mortgage market. So the logic is not there. I really don't understand. What are these so called toxic assets? What about the other 90% of the mortgage market? Huh? Just think about it man? You see it takes three things to keep a house (job, lending, and a market price worth staying in your home).

3) It is funny how companies are so quick to run to the government for a bailout when they made stupid decisions.

4) Democrats pay taxes just like Republicans. Ask AIG for my 160 billion back. Citigroup, JP Morgan, Bank of America, Chase, Wells Fargo, Wachovia, etc. It is funny how I don't have accounts with those institutions. Please and I am begging, please return the money if you don't need it. ROFL. Who is next ? You hate big government but why in the hell is GM, Chrysler and all of these companies begging the government for bridge loans? That is really funny to me.

5) Please let's retire this so called word called "socialism". If you believe in the capitalist system don't ask the government for bailouts. Please and I say please don't ask the government for anything. If you are screwed go out of business then. It is funny how out of all of the financial institutions got money but Lehman Brothers was left out to die. Why didn't they bail out Lehman? Anyway. Did the economy die? Nope. The capitalist system says take risks but when you fail you should fail. No government bailouts or handouts. This is worse than the entitlement programs that people benefit from everyday. I am in support of food stamps, WIC, Medicaid, Medicare and Prescription drug plans. Trust me man if people could pay for it they would.

6) Once again Democrats pay taxes like Republicans. Ok let's talk about these tax cuts. Do you make 250K or more? If you don't please shut the hell up. Barack wants to restore the pre-Bush tax cuts. It is funny how so many folks talk about my taxes, my taxes are going up..The world is falling in.. Please wake up and go take a chill pill. You will keep paying the same amount as usual. And technically if I am not mistaken, we are only talking about an additional 2-3% of tax increase. If a 3% tax increase is going to make your small business crash or you are going to lose your home, I would recommend you review your business plan.

7)When did conservatism think Democrats don't believe in Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness? Did the founders forget the Democratic party? That is why we have a bicameral legislative body. Also Hannity doesn't think Democrats don't believe in a higher being? It is amazing how much he quotes Ronald Reagan but he doesn't talk about George Bush. LOL.

This is enough for now. I want to see what kind of backlash I will get and also the bashing from conservative folks. We tried Bush's way for the last 8 years but we have 15 million people out of work. And in no way you can put this on Barack because he has only been in office for less than 50 days or so but Bush was in there for 8 years. Hmmn.. 50 Days vs 8 years? I don't understand.. LOL..

Aigght Holla,

Calvin

rachell enger said...

we want some pictures of lydia!

rachell enger said...

I am glad we have your in-laws post so we finally get updates on your little girl...