Recent Events

So, how’s it going?
What’ve you been up to lately?
Me? Not much.
A couple weekends ago was sort of busy. Had some people come in from out of town…20 of them; ate a ton of food; got married…you know, same old, same old.

Yeah, it’s been a wild ride. I’m married…no longer Logan Roberts of the Shane and Miriam Roberts family (though I still am; they were thrilled about it so there’s no disowning or anything); I am now Logan Roberts of the Logan and Paula Roberts family. This is just the tip of an iceberg of change, the likes of which could sink the Titanic quicker than Dave Cashman runs the 40 (9.8 seconds flat):
A woman is in my bed when I wake up in the morning
Food – real food – can be found in the fridge AND the kitchen cabinets
It is never messy at 1714
I've become an uncle
The bed is made daily as opposed to weekly
Actual towel SETS are in the linen closets
I'm doing what married people do...pay bills, engage in financial stress, go to bed at 9pm, gain weight, ETC ;-)
Linen closets are being used
My closet space has been reduced more dramatically than Star Jones’ waistline
Meals are made. Real ones…With vegetables…Eaten from a plate…Not the pan/can
A woman is in my bed when I go to bed at night
At this point being married is so much easier than being engaged. Being engaged was, how do I put this…hell. I didn’t like it. It was similar to a Steven Segal movie: the opening sequence is action packed and exciting, but by the end you’re just happy it’s over.
But I married an amazing woman and things have been just peachy (we are in the Peach State). The only thing that has irked me is one morning I’m getting ready for work and the only clean pair of pants I have are these dark blue-borderline-black ones. So I put them on with a black polo shirt; when Paula sees me I get the look.
“What?”
“You’re not wearing that.” (note this was a statement, not a question)
“I’m not?” (imagine the incredulous tone in my voice)
“No. It doesn’t look good.”
“Fine. What should I wear.” (note this was not a question, rather it was a sarcastic comment)
So I’m given this long-sleeved grey polo-esque shirt. She says don’t be mad. I say it’s been about 20 years since anyone dressed me. At work I’m asked how being married is and I say great (cuz it is); then they ask what is different and I share the story from that morning. And you know what they tell me?
“She’s right. That’d looked bad. This is very nice.”
Crap.