Friday, February 03, 2006

6 degrees to my biznas

Two games: First, telephone. People sit in a circle and someone says a phrase in one person's ear and it passes on and on and on; the conclusion is finding out to what length the message was diluted. Second, six degrees to Kevin Bacon. Name any actress or actor and link them to Kevin Bacon in six movies or less. Well, sit right down and I will tell you a tale of a real-life occurence.
There was this one time, when I was a little younger (two weeks ago), when my fiance and I were a little miffed at each other; details are not important, but suffice it to say when we arrived to meet a group of friends for dinner it was apparent something was awry. Then we made a mistake: telling the group.
My sweet fiance started and revealed trespasses I committed, some of which I was unaware. I went on the defensive and when my time for self-defense arose I trumped her insensitive comments with harsh words of my own; from this point some other events transpired to make the evening memorable for all, but for unpleasant reasons.
These details are sufficient for this blog; happily, the issues were resolved before parting to our seperate residence at the end of the night and valuable lessons were learned. Paula, in her maturity, refrained from telling her parents or family members of the event because it was no longer relevant. On a side note, I am grateful for this; I have several friends who married and one party (generally the girl. No offense, just a fact) did not follow a steadfast rule - resolve issues between yourselves and don't include in-laws. Involving family in silly disputes creates hard feelings lasting much longer than the argument.
So, two weeks later Paula gets home from work and her mother asks her if we'd had an argument in public. And then Momma K used exact dialogue from our exchange in referencing said disputation. Paula was amazed (and so am I) the information was relayed back so accurately. What amazes me most is how it maintained it's accuracy through several sources, the chain of which I am going to reveal - in reverse order - in a game I like to call '6 Degrees to My Biznas':
Momma K was told by her oldest daughter Natalie1 ; Natalie G was told by her friend Natalie D2 who recently became engaged to Jesse3 - Natalie G and her husband had the newly engaged couple over for dinner; Jesse rents a room in a house owned by Dave4 (who's real name is Quentin); Dave was at Max and Erma's when everything went down5. Five degrees, message perfectly preserved. Congratufreakinlations
Wow. I'm not really suprised the issue surfaced; we made the mistake of arguing in public. What blows my mind is the clarity in which the event was relayed and that it was started, with crystal accuracy, by a man and not a woman.


Will & Natalie Giddens said...

Look on the bright side: At least now you know when people are talking about you, they're getting their facts straight. :-)

The alleged #5 said...

I totally disagree. When I originally related the story to #3 aka Jesse, I told him that the whole situation was the root cause of Logan's appendix becoming infected. Thus, causing the aforementioned discomfort and graphic description therein, proving that I had spun my own illicit and incorrect commentary on the fateful night's proceedings. That sole fact pulls me out of the purported succesion and chain of "accurate sources". Another reason I am guiltless in the whole matter is that we must not forget that I was fending off and trying to thwart the unwelcome advances of the groping waiter, who felt the need to constantly whisper in my ear the entire evening. With such distractions, I would be incapable of remembering the accurate chronology of how the events transpired.
The following are only suppositions, but all are definite hypotheses of what may have come to pass, bringing to light the events of that fateful night. Jesse (aka #3) may have had a communique with any of the following possibilities:

5A-Megan W.--we all know she is a good story teller.

5B-Merrin McW.--lives with 5A and enjoys humorous stories that take the emphasis off of her interesting relationships with the martial arts.

5C-Amy--known for her endless forwards of a humorous nature...she assumed the replay would make for a great electronic WorldWide reaching.

5D-Tamara-Upset that Paula is getting married, thus making her ineligible to serve as the RSP, Tamara was making a last ditch effort so that she would not have to be tapped as the next RSP.

5E-Steve-the non-member, I am sure he was just taking it all in. He has already been terrified by Merrin (5B) and Megan's (5A)endless flirtings, he was just trying to remember something else from the evening.

5F-Neighbor Dan- I am not sure he said anything the entire evening; allowing him time to record the events as they transpired into copious notes.

5G-Remund's mom-She was on a date that evening at the very same restaurant. The date was boring, making our table the center ring of the Max and Erma circus.

5H-The ambigously gay waiter-He was just using me to get to Logan. After he realized that Logan wasn't jealous and that I was just nauseated, he turned his plan into breaking up the happy couple. He wanted to give Logan the ride home. Sidenote: I pray each night for both myself and Logan, that this is the incorrect one.

Again, I remind you that these are only well-educated guesses. Any information contained in the above comment was probably confidential and I have again spilled the metaphorical beans, unintentionally and unaware.

Mr. Roberts said...

#5, those are some keen insights, many of which are quite probable. My money's on 5H or 5F, or the roommates. Or Colonel Mustard with the rope in the Billard Room....

thrown under the bus by her very own bro said...

While it is a widely known fact that I have endlessly offered to relieve Paula of the binding chains of marital bliss with one, Logan Roberts, I would never spread such tales of woe...unless it involves a young, black boy who witnessed the brutal attack on another's penis. Shame on you, Quentin David, for throwing your sis under the bus.